As you may or may not know yet, Oakley is indeed my
“I ran away from home”, he told me.
I believed him at first, despite my skepticism. But I couldn’t help wonder how Oakley could be so brave to run away from home and trek cross-country to come see me.
That’s when I learned from Mum that Oakley’s parents had gone on vacation and left him here. Oakley just “pretended” to run away from home so as to –I dunno, give off the impression he could be a bad boy?
At least he arrived with his own toy, which means he shouldn’t be stealing any of mine!
Oakley came all the way here from Toronto. So I found it a little humorous to inform him we were all headed back to Toronto in just a couple days for the Woofstock High Tea Red Carpet Event for our “teaser celebrity appearance” before the actual Woofstock event happening at the end of September, which I’m also going to BTW (you should come if you can – it’s free admission and the largest outdoor dog event in all of North America!).
“Oh ya?” Oakley said. “Well can I come too?”
“Sure”, I said. “We need a celebrity costume though.” I paused for a moment. “Obviously we could just go as ourselves, but then again, what fun is that?”
So without an immediate idea, we put the thought on the back-burner.
The first few days together were pretty relaxed, hanging out at home and taking long walks in the park. Oakley generally needs to stay leashed even at the park, because all it takes is one whiff of a squirrel tail and the rest of the world pretty much zones out while he goes on an endless mission to find it.
Once in a while Dad would permit Oakley to have a little free-range fun though, often at Mum’s reluctance.
At which point the only logical thing to do (and to distract Oakley from finding a squirrel scent), is to race!
Those first few days were also exceptionally hot and humid, especially for September, which is why you will also observe some exceptionally floppy tongues…
It was the squinty eyes here that sparked our costume idea.
“How about we go as rappers!” I exclaimed. And what better combo for Oakley and I than Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg, respectively!
Yippee yo yippee yay!
We immediately put Mum and Dad to work to get our costumes made. It was just the day before the event that we tried them on for the first time!
“My hat’s a little too big, but it’ll do”, I told Dad (I try not to praise him too much because I don’t want him getting lazy).
So the next morning we hopped in the car and drove to Toronto, and when we finally arrived at the Fairmont Royal York in downtown, we were greeted with a long red carpet and a spectacle of camera flashes.
Oakley and I quickly assumed our side-by-side pose to make easy work for the paparazzi. And for anyone who doesn’t really know Snoop Dogg or Dr. Dre, here’s their pictures for reference 😉
And when we entered the ball room, we were overwhelmed with all the glitz and glamor – from the fashion runway to the fancy tiered cookie trays atop the tables, and crystal chandeliers!
Then right there by the entrance, my draw dropped at the sight of Katy Perry!
Okay, she was just a look-alike, but she did a pretty good job! And considering Snoop Dogg and Katy Perry recently did a song together (California Gurls), I obviously had to snap a photo with her.
But of course, once I did Oakley wanted one as well.
I think he enjoyed it a bit too much though 😉
In fact, he kept making excuses to take more photos with her; “oh wait, I blinked”, “oh wait, that’s not my good side”, “oh wait, I got distracted by that shiny chandelier”, “oh – wait, what are we waiting for again?”
“Alright, that’s enough Oakley”, I told him with a tolerant laugh.
From there we mingled further into the ballroom to socialize and meet some new people. One of the first people – er, dogs, we met was this amazing fellow by the name of Hero the Super Collie!
If you haven’t heard of him, he does some utterly amazing tricks and performances! It’s a good thing my celebrity career is not based on tricks, because there’s no way I can compete with this guy! 😉
I mean, here’s what he can do…
Then there was also Joey Iggy, the sensuous Italian greyhound, dressed as Cleopatra of course.
I love an exotic woman 😉
Then finally it was time for the main event – the costume contest, where contestants must walk up and down the runway, showcasing their celebrity-themed costumes for the judges, guests, and puparazzi!
So being the canine celebrity ambassador of Woofstock, I took my spot as 1 of the 4 celebrity judges at the judging table (sorry Oakley).
Meanwhile, all the attendees took their seats at the tables around the room to watch the show.
Like this guy.
Over at the judges table, I made friends quick with the fellow celebrities.
Here I am next to singer/songwriter Danielle Bourjeaurd, Andy O’brien (a founder of BuyTopia.ca), and Michele Romanow who’s a dragon on this season of Dragon’s Den (Canadian version of Shark Tank).
We sat together at the table while the canine contestants strutted their costume-adorned selves down the runway in front of us. There were some pretty elaborate costumes that would even give me a run for my money!
♫ Mind on my money, money on my mi–♬
–Oop, sorry, got too deep in character there.
Heck, they came out in dog-drawn carriages…
…as dinosaurs from Jurassic World…
…And even as Superman and Superwoman!
When the contestants reached the end of the catwalk dogwalk, the cameras were all waiting!
Anyway, as the show went on I needed to rest my little paws so I figured it would be acceptable (since I’m a celebrity – and not to mention a dog) to just lay out on the table…
I did my best to stay focused on the costumes, but I found my gaze constantly drifting back to the tiered cookie trays on the other tables – because the JUDGES’ TABLE DOESN’T GET a cookie tray! What the heck?!
But anyway, I tried to stay focused on the task at hand.
Once we’d seen all the costumes, I turned to my fellow judges. “So guys, what do you think?”
We all had our own thoughts but finally came to a consensus. The winners were chosen, and thenceforth there were rounds of applause and cheers all around.
I was admittedly relieved to be finished as a judge. Now I could finally hop over to one of the tables for some cookies and tea with Oakley!
Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre are not your typical tea party-goers, but nonetheless we make a great appearance at any party.
Oakley however, is not used to such high-society etiquette as myself. In fact, he’s not even allowed to sit at the dinner table at home! Such an absurd thought would never fly at my house…
So earlier, I had to tell him, “Oakley, it’s okay, you’re allowed to put your paws up on the table!”
Once Oakley realized I was telling the truth – and that it wasn’t a trick to get him in trouble, he put his paws up. At that point I thought I’d set an example to him on how upper class canines such as myself call to a waiter.
“Oh waiter”, I barked. “Bring us some of your best tea and biscuits and be snappy about it, I am friggin’ starving because SOMEONE forgot to serve cookies to the judges’ table.”
The waiter dutifully obliged and went to get us some.
Oakley then looked at me and asked, “what do we do now?”
“Just do your best to look pompous and unimpeachable, and make light conversation about any trivial matters of the day.”
“But, but..” Oakley stuttered. “I don’t know what any of that means?!…”
At that point I just shushed Oakley, he was cramping my pretentious charm.
Finally the waiter arrived with some tea. I could tell right away by the look on Oakley’s face that he was thinking, ‘but, but, I don’t drink tea!’
“It’s not human tea”, I interjected in his thought process. “It’s beef bouillon.”
I turned my attention to the waiter as he poured my own. I didn’t want him to chince on my serving.
So it was with great pleasure that Oakley and I finally enjoyed some tea and biscuits, after all.
From there, the party began to wind down.
We socialized with some of our new friends, and were also very pleased to meet Cooper here who was one of the winners of my free ticket giveaway for the event, and who – unlike Oakley, had absolutely no hesitation jumping right up onto the table and digging in! 🙂
So with that, it’s time for a super quick video summary:
Overall, it was a lovely good time. It was also a good taste of what the classy celebrity life is like for my brother Oakley.
I think he enjoyed the event too, especially Katy Perry.
I’ll be at the main Woofstock event September 26 and 27 in Toronto! Come see me for photos together, pawtographed pictures, and more fun!
Keep bein’ classy,
~ Crusoe
Enjoy this post, “like” it! 🙂 And as promised, stay tuned for my “how to build a minions dog costume”, coming soon!
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