Cooking with Crusoe: Steak & Sweet Potatoes

On this episode of Cooking with Crusoe, I’ll be making a delicious home-cooked meal of steak and sweet potatoes for dogs. That’s right, this is not a human food recipe this time, although I’m sure people would enjoy anything Chef Crusoe puts out.

Plus, I’ll also be showing you how to cook with “love” (and a bit of lust). Make sure to check out the video summary below, too!

Crusoe in his Dog Chef Costume!


  • A nice big, juicy steak.
  • A sweet potato.
  • Coconut oil.
  • Rice (if you’re boring and want to add it).

Step 1: Lick it

First of all, the smell of steak has already got me licking my chops. I have to be careful while cooking this as I could be tempted to take a bite, even in it’s raw form.

Cute Chef Crusoe

But it’s good to be hungry while you cook. That just makes the activity all the more engaging and fun.

So the first step here is to take the steak out of its packaging, lay it on the cutting board, and give it a good conquering stare to tell yourself you won’t take a bite out of it until you’re done preparing the meal.


I couldn’t help but take a couple licks just to wet my appetite, but that’s acceptable – so you know.

Step 2: Spank it, baby

Now we have to tenderize this steak so that it melts in our mouth. Us dogs often forget to chew when it comes time to eating something as scrumptious as this, so it’s best to at least serve it somewhat pre-chewed.

Most people would call this action ‘tenderizing’, but we’re making this meal with love (and a bit of lust), and so it’s called ‘spanking it’.


I am quite proficient at this, considering my many attendances to Sexy Lady Wiener Parties..

Step 3: Bust out the oil

That’s right – we’re about to get kinky with some coconut oil. Coconut oil is really good for dogs, both as a food and an exterior application. It has anti-inflammatory, antibacterial, and antifungal properties, whatever the heck all that means. Most importantly, it’s tasty and really good for our health.

Coconut Oil for Dog Food

This is what we’re going to use to sear our steak in.

But while you have authorized access to snoop in the cupboard, take this opportunity to make a mental note of any stashes of treats or cookies in there. I will exploit this at a later chance when Mum and Dad are unaware.


Step 4: Intermission

I know it’s just getting excited, but this is where I briefly step out of the kitchen for a little intermission. You see, supposedly the potatoes take longer to cook than the steak, and due to my limited foresight we now have to play ‘catch up’ on the potatoes so everything will be ready at the same time.

I told Mum that nobody wants to see me cook potatoes (because they’re boring), so that she could do it while I caught a quick nap.

Cute Dachshund Sleeping

Step 5: Make it sizzle

Now for the fun part. This is where we add in our coconut oil to the pan, let it melt down (which it will do quickly), and then toss in our steak.

Are you paying attention?

Click to enlarge or to save as a screensaver/background.


It’s important to hear the sizzle. Shaking the pan back and forth doesn’t really do anything, but it does enhance the sound and make you look more like a chef.

Step 6: Take a video

So for those of you who like to skimp on the reading, here’s a quick 6-second Vine video tutorial:

Notice my little ‘hop-to’ when getting started? This is recommended.

As I mentioned earlier, you can also add a bit of white rice into the recipe for a little more substance, but it’s the steak that I care about (sweet potatoes are pretty good too though).

Step 7: Indulge the senses

And finally, now we get to indulge in our delicious creation. With this meal I recommend a nice Pinot Noir or Cabernet Sauvignon red wine, but feel free to pair with whatever suits your taste best.

Take a (brief) moment to admire your creation, sniff the aromas, and let the slobber build up in your mouth.

Steak and Sweet Potatoes - Dog Meal!

And when you’re ready, chow down like it’s your last meal on Earth.

(But seriously, it’s good to eat slow).

Homemade dog food recipe

Step 8: Brag about it to your friends

This is pretty much what I’ve done by writing this post. And hey, if ye’ dig it, feel free to do likewise!

Hope you liked my steak and potatoes meal. It was absolutely delicious. Try it yourself sometime!

And fans, I have one little favor to ask! As you know, I recently took home the prize for Best Pet Blog of 2013 at the Bloggies. But guess what – there’s another award I have my eye on, and that’s a Petties Pet Blog Award! If you could nominate me for Funniest Blog (I don’t really mean to be funny but supposedly it comes off that way) that would be awesome and much appreciated! I need to continue on my steak streak and my ever-continuous quest for becoming more of a celebrity than I think I am!

Thanks so much fans! You’re the best.

Keep sizzlin’,

~ Crusoe

Keep ballin’,