The Dachshund United Nations - and My Interpretation!

The Dachshund United Nations (UN) is a traveling contemporary art event by the Australian artist, Bennett Miller.

Miller says he chose dachshunds because of their similarities to humans, such as their expressions, racial diversity (black, brown, red, etc), and how they are so proud and determined. In fact, he actually chose dachshunds that look like their human delegate counterparts! Just take a look at some:

This is H.E. Mr. Yukio Takasu, permanent representative of Japan.

And this is H.E. Hisham Badr, permanent representative of the Arab Republic of Egypt.

And of course, H.E. Dr. Susan Rice, permanent representative of the United States of America.

Through his work, Miller is portraying the, “meditation on the utopian aspirations of the Commission on Human Rights, and our capacity as humans to imagine and achieve a universal system of justice.” At least that’s what he says.

What they don’t tell you is that it’s actually a real conglomeration of dachshund delegates from around the world, there to discuss the most pressing wiener-related issues affecting our breed today, such as how we’re going to take over the dog world, and how China isn’t producing enough squeaky balls.

I would be happy to lead the discussion.

As I am still running for Presidinster of the world, I expect to receive my official invite in the mail any day now, where I will give a fantastic speech that will surely sway the crowd in my favor – I just haven’t decided which way to sway them yet. And if I can’t physically make it to the next event, they can Skype me in.

You can tell the below wiener is very charismatic as well.

If I were there, I would be advocating the donation of squeaky balls to poor doggies, and promoting the adoption of wieners.

I think all countries should agree that wiener dogs get free visas for traveling to and from anywhere, and get to skip all customs and security lines. In essence, every dachshund is a celebrity (at least we think we are), and so should be treated as such.

Now, I’m still not sure why they are inviting wired-hair dachshunds to this thing. We all know they cannot be trusted. Some people say, “oh, but they’re so cute”. Well, that’s all the more reason not to trust them. They are cute, cuddly, and deceiving, trust me.

In fact, just look at the above wire-haired. He has turned away from the crowd, probably because he just realized that he tripped up on his own story.

Then there’s this one. Obviously China is very distraught about something. Maybe because they feel they can’t meet my demands for squeaky balls, but even more likely that they want to be able to create doggy profiles on Facebook, just like everyone else!

I would also like to point out that Mexico appears to be on a potty break. Koodos to my Facebook fan, Amy Buchheit Hannum, for that joke ; ) I guess breakfast burritos aren’t the best choice before a UN summit.

Oakley insisted to join me for our Skype call. I told him he could come sit beside me if he let me do all the talking. He agreed to this, but when we tried recording our first speech, he kept kissing me because he was so happy! (He’s a very kissy doxie). I just told him, “ya, ya, get over it”. But oh well, gotta give the little bro some love! Even though I couldn’t really get my speech out, it was worth it just to see Oakley so happy.

Keep representin’,

~ Crusoe & Oakley